Screech in need of Scratch

ScreechI could not resist posting something about this story from USA Today.  It seems Dustin Diamond, a.k.a. Screech from the show "Saved by the Bell," is selling T-shirts to keep his home out of foreclosure.  Was this taken from a leftover script of the show?  He is trying to sell 30,000 shirts at $15.00 each to keep the man from ripping his mortgage back from him?  Are you serious?  I know this guy is a comedian now so maybe this is just a bit, but who would have thought that this Bayside High alum would be in such a quandary?  And where are Zack Morris, A.C. Slater, Kelly Kopowski, and the rest of the gang when Screech needs them?  Is Zack going to come up with a scheme to move these shirts by offering to take the "nerdy girl with the rich dad" to the dance, only to fail when his conscience gets the best of him?  Will A.C. enter a push up contest to build publicity for poor Samuel Powers?  Will Jessie turn into Vegas show girl…oh wait, that idea already bombed.  And where does Lisa Turtle come in?  What about Mr. Belding and Miss Bliss or that weird guy from the summer camp where the entire cast managed to get jobs?  Selling T-shirts?  What about a reality show?  I mean if that guy who lost on the apprentice, former members of "The Real World," and Gary Coleman can get on a show, can't Screech?  Maybe you could put Screech, Skippy Handelman, Horshack, Carol Seaver, and Punky Brewster on a Raft headed south, Huck Finn Style.  Each week, somebody is cast off into the mighty Mississippi.  They can explore the towns, gamble in the riverboats, and drift along aimlessly fighting about who had the greatest career.  The finale takes place in New Orleans, where the winner gets a parade down Burbon Street…  It beats T-shirts.  If only he had spent a little less time with Zack and A.C. and a little more time hitting the books, poor Screech might have enjoyed a different fate.  Alas, Screech is now selling shirts, get yours today.  For an extra 5 bucks he will sign it for you.  Oh yeah, and a funny side note.  They even had to change the spelling of Screech to Screeech on the shirts to avoid litigation.  Will Screech be saved by the bell?  I really hope so.  Stay tuned. – 'Screech' actor turns to fans for help

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